Monday, December 30, 2013

The Last Supper .. Holy number 12

This will be the last day i write about gratitude in 2013.. The last 12 days has been great since i have tried to remember all the good things God has provided through out the year.

Last Supper is my favorite painting. One painting that give picture to moment where the celebration of God promises start. One last day before the storm came.. but that last storm will eventually be the fulfilment of God words. Day He save mankind.

That painting was the last day and Jesus decided to be a humble servant to His disciples. He washed his disciples feet with His own hand. Shared breads and wine to close the journey.. and opening the new chapter of Bible.. Gave ways to all saints to reveal the truth.

He came to save us all.. He suffered...He died.. He has risen... He is the love and the light.. to the unworthy. Thank you God for loving me. Thank you for giving me many chances and opportunities. Thank you for the amazing life up to this very minute.

Sunday, December 29, 2013

The Twin Number 11 : The Number One Doesn't Stand Alone

Three days away... I'll be leaving the amazing year of 2013.. Years that brings much joy .. much blessings from Jesus..

Thank God for making me believing in miracle.. Things that impossible.. Things that i thought i can't .. He showed me His power and love for the unworthy. He made things happen..Hosana in the highest.

Yesterday i ponder upon "Running alone to the finish line" .. what if our life so alone that we decide to just go on without anyone.. Because in the end we go to Jesus without a thing.. without anyone as well. Yet today He answer me from afternoon devotion. He showed me one passage from the bible :

Genesis 2 : 18 " And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; i will make him an help meet for him"

This one passage explains and answers my question all along.. i shall not be alone and will never be alone... because God will and always prepare someone to help me.. help us.. Human not created to be alone.. God created all the support we need to live. He never forgot where..when..and how to help our life. Up to the point He uses every tiny details in our life to save us from the dark side. He promise that no darkness will ever touch us.. Not even a single hair will fall without His permission. This is how much He loves us...the unworthy. He makes us worthy in His eyes. Without His kindness we won't survive. 

Friday, December 27, 2013

Rainbow Troops : The Edensor ..My10th Story

I was watching my favorite movie the day before today. Indonesian Movie "Laskar Pelangi: Edensor ". THis one Indonesian movie taken from best selling novel by Andrea Hirata. From the very first movie of Laskar pelangi i always have a good feeling after seeing the movie. This movie tell story about friendship and dreams. Simple things that everybody wants.

There is one sentence that capture my heart even after 2 days away : " Dream as high as you can ..that God can embrace and hold your dream". I have so many dream.. but i didn't pursue them with all of me because i still have responsibility to my Dad.. but you can imagine if i don't have anyone else beside me.. i might just leave Indonesia already and chase my dreams to travel around the world and just stop myself from having too much to think of. Thats why.. once in a while i think this is not everything that i can be. I can do more... and i want more!! This is not the life i want to live. One day.. i can't hold back the rebel side of me any longer. Until that day come.. i'll be patiently wait and keep on dreaming as high as i could that God can embrace my dreams so easily.

9th Days of Devotion

Have a thankful heart is lesson i choose to do to end 2013.  Getting 12 days of thanks God challenge remind me to keep my humble heart and put my gratitude before complaining to bad things.

the 9th post also got delayed yesterday..because i have a date with my friends hahah my girls form Master Program class.. I really do thankful that i have friends that i can hang out with. Funny and talkative friends indeed. We just decide to catched up each other stories. Some are loosing someone.. some are happy in love.. some are just like me.. But to top it all we decide to laugh everything in our life and just have fun. I don't remember being so alone when i'm with them. We even agreed the only thing we gain from Master Program is new friends and family. Hahahaha.. Oh and we get to know two new Hongkong Friends too. Hahaha Tania decide to tag a long 2 of her foreign friends with her. Well i think we've been a bad host yesterday..because we pretty much just talk between ourself. Well.. hopefully they can understand we didn't mean to exclude them.

By September this year.. i thank God that He add another year into my life. Friends and family also join to celebrate my birthday. I should be thank God for another year that has been added to my Dad's life too. For without a Dad i might live so alone. Thanks God for bringing me joy thru' people around me.

Thursday, December 26, 2013

Dear Old Lucky "Wrecking Ball" Number Eight

Ok.. so by August.. the eight month of the 2013.. i already sat on my new office desk. New position of course.. happy and sound. Thanks God.. the new office mates are being very welcome. A whole new world but happy that i got the chance. Things are getting better this year.

I basically having more and more things to be thankful for. New friends, new life, new job, new status? Uh huh? hahahahah no no no.. i'm still keeping my status quo. Hahaha and one day i'll know why i need to keep my status quo all along. But today.. gratitude is everything i'll be writing about.

Today, is one day after Christmas.. had a great time yesterday.. and Jingle Ball celebration top the night hahahah. Nice concept ...Whenever i listen to the title "Jingle Ball" .. remind me of controversial "Miley Cyrus" and her new song the "Wrecking Ball". Well guess what?? She sang 3 song on that "Jingle Ball" so.. yeah.. you know how the comitee come up with the title.

Her controversial act put her name to the top of music industry. This is how our world judge things. World easily put someone as the center of love and hate. Easily put them on top or just seamingly famous yet .. world can easily drop 'em in a blink of an eye if don't watch our step. Those that call you friends might just actually a hidden enemy.

Everything happens in our life are like a swing of wrecking ball. We need to be cautious. Anticipate things that happens in our life. When a wrecking ball swing to your direction .. pivot your step .. when a good chance comes in .. don't hesitate to embrace it. Thanks God.. for giving me a lot to embrace this year. 

Tuesday, December 24, 2013

And On The 7th Day.. He Rest

7th Day of 12 days thanks God challenge is here. Turn out it is exactly on Jesus born day.
Happy born day Jesus.. we really really do love You. Hahahaha..

Thanks God it's Christmas. My 29th Christmas. Thanks God for His blessings i can still enjoy Christmas.. Still without my Mom.. but i still have that chef skill in the kitchen. So.. as in tradition.. i made home made pasta and pudding for dessert. Today.. i will make another home made cooking.. i'm thinking grilled dory and potato salad. Yeap... this is my season to put my professional chef skill into action hahahah.

The pasta recipe is simple but taste fantastic.. My Dad is the biggest fan of my home made cooking. He never complain anything about my taste in cooking. Hahahahaha.. and he allow me to make trial and error here and there. Growin up without my Mom means i really get all the skill needed to survive in the kitchen. It all started when i really wanted to eat homemade macaronie schotel. Hahaha no Mom means i need to cooked it myself. I search, browse and make adjustment to my taste and voila.. turn out i can cook !!  And the kitchen got busy again ever since. Thanks Mom.. i know i'm your child because little things that i can do i know you got that skill too. Miss you a lot this Christmas.. See you when i see you Ma...

Merry Christmas Fellas.. this is the day to bless one another.. Day that God has given us His only Son. May God bless us all. Be the light !!

Monday, December 23, 2013

The Indulgence of Christmas Eve: My 6th Bless

Indulgence is actually the guilt has been forgiven written in Catholic Encyclopedia. I'm not a Catholic actually. I have few Catholic friends and they are pretty much a good Catholic.

I love the way they translate the word "Indulgence" : a gratification from Jesus upon our sins. Can you imagine to live a life without any gratification? I don't think i made it to be a Christian if Jesus never been born .. tormented and died up on that cross. Human Race will never be forgiven and will be wiped away in an instance if God doesn't have any mercy. This is our bless. He died for us to live.. He was born poor to make us rich.. He was sacrificed saved us all.

This is my Christmas devotion "How deep is our gratitude upon this abundant blessing He has given to us ?"
"How are we going to show our gratitude heart to Him?" Been in this devotion many times.. But when the answer is so clear of things that i should do .. i end up not really doing it. For heaven sake.. how can we ever take this "indulgence" for granted ?

well anyway.. keep this question inside our heart.. so that when we pray tonight.. we can continuously pray to keep our heart away from sin and may God gives us courage to repay His pure loving heart for us.. That we will do better in showing our gratitude heart after Christmas.

The Frozen Heart : 5th Charm

So... okay.. i got late post again..
Yesterday i decided to treat my self with movies and food and groceries shopping ... A simple date with myself.
Thanks God.. the weather was nice ..not gloomy and not rainy. But i went home quite late and pretty much tired.

I watched "Frozen" ..A nice cartoon movie by Disney. I really do like the characters..the settings.. the whole movie is amazing. Hahahaha.. what can i say.. i still love Disney Movie no matter how old i am. It always feels magical. This 'child like' heart inside of me never fail to enjoy such things.

One of the character is Elsa.. the Ice Queen.. she has a charm to freeze things.. every thing she touch becomes ice. She can make beautiful ice castle and everything but at the same time she can wound her sister with her charm. It was all in the matter of a 'heart'. A happy heart or a fearful heart. In the first half of the movie she always said "don't feel..conceal it" .. guess what.. we did that once in a while.. We prentending to be happy and keep that warm smile.. when our heart is actually  as cold as ice inside.  That movie remind me to keep asking Jesus to melt my "ice rock" heart.

The past few years built me up as an ice queen to my cousins, aunts, and uncles.. Yes.. it is true that they hurt my family once..but do i have the right to judge them..? Who am i to 'cast a spell' upon them ? But i haven't got a chance to fix this. Up until today.. i still fight my self to settle the problem and ask for forgiveness. Not that i claim that I'm lost.. but to bring peace in my heart. Put this a side.. Thanks God for forgiving me numerous times. He never has "ice cold" heart upon my mistakes and sins. How can i be this 'ice cold' to someone else?

Sunday, December 22, 2013

The 4th Day

oke... so here we go.. the 4th day.. something i grateful for in April 2013..

This challenge is simply not easy at all.. hahahah but to force myself remembering things makes me realize there is more i should be thankful for in life.

April.. hmm... so what was happening yaa.. lol.. i really do forget this month.. this is definitely my second month in my master degree.. Things are awesome .. better yet.. my boss propose me for a new job opportunity. I've been propose to the same job last year actually.. but i still haven't got a clue how to answer this so i passed. This time.. i said yes. !!

God listen to my prayer and one of them is about my job. Sometimes i feel like i was born to do something greater.. better than just being admin as in my previous job this past 5 years. Not like i feel beeter than any other as in i praise myself.. is just that i don't want to get stuck in a place where i couldn't do any change at all. Being in my previous job definitely stop me for doing major change. It was frustrating. So... it was a BIG YES for me this time. I don't think that i can do this but i try my best. At least i have the heart to do this job.

I have to wait for my replacement and everything else should be in place before i really moved in to my new office desk. Hahaha best moments of the year indeed.

Thanks God for another opportunity this year. I really love this year.

Friday, December 20, 2013

February through March : Ask and You Shall be Given

Yesterday I missed one of the 12 days of thanks God challenge. So many things to do since morning. So I try to keep up to day.

One of my gratitude toward Jesus in February 2013 is … uhmm… ahahahah this takes time.. cos’ I really don’t remember what happened in February. I still don’t have a date but.. I guess this was the month where I looked forward to start my new journey as a student one more time. Yes.. one of the amazing opportunity I had in 2012 is to propose scholarship to study at Universitas Ciputra. Somehow all of the board of director agreed and early this year I join the test. Guess what??!! I got accepted at Master of Entrepreneurship, Universitas Ciputra !!

This is one of my dream to continue and pursue my Master Degree. God listen really carefully for this wish.. after 7 years, I finally continue my studies free of charge and still got full salary every month. Thanks God for this.

On March, I start my first class. Well I try to fit in with all this newbie around me.. hahaha.. Half of the class are younger than me. But I guess I manage to blend in quite well. March 2013 is another Month to be thankful for.. indeed. A new beginning actually happened continuously through out the year.. 

Sometimes.. things that I found it impossible… God made it happen just in the right time. 
Lesson learned during this month : I didn’t get anything because I probably not asking properly enough to Him. 

Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Thankful ~ Josh Goban

This is one of my favorite Christmas Song.. a song by Josh Groban in his 'Noel' album.
Remind me to say thanks everytime ..never fail to brings joy and peace in my heart. Come and read the lyric with me. and you'll know why i love this song:

Somedays we forget
To look around us
Somedays we can't see
The joy that surrounds us
So caught up inside ourselves
We take when we should give.

So for tonight we pray for
What we know can be.
And on this day we hope for
What we still can't see.
It's up to us to be the change
And even though we all can still do more
There's so much to be thankful for.

Look beyond ourselves
There's so much sorrow
It's way too late to say
I'll cry tomorrow
Each of us must find our truth
It's so long overdue

So for tonight we pray for 
What we know can be
And every day we hope for
What we still can't see
It's up to us to be the change
And even though we all can still do more
There's so much to be thankful for.

Even with our differences 
There is a place we're all connected
Each of us can find each other's light

So for tonight we pray for
What we know can be
And on this day we hope for 
What we still can't see
It's up to us to be the change
And even though this world needs so much more

There's so much to be thankful for..

We forget things easily.. especially we easily caught up in our own sorrow and misery. We seems to unable to recognize little things that God has provide us. How much time and energy He put to makes us smile everyday.

Whenever i failed to make somebody that i love happy i always sad and dissapoint at myself. Now think.. how God must have felt when He never stop trying to make us happy yet we constantly ask God why you put misery into my life. Think again !!

God is good.. He never put us in jeopardy.. He definitely never plan bad things to our life. We need to see and open our eyes to all the good things that happens around us. We need to open our heart to rejoice more.. We need to open our mouth to say Thanks God more often .. 

Life is beautiful when you have a beautiful heart within you.. Thanks God it's Christmas season.. There is no Christmas without Christ.

12 Days of Thanks God Challenge : Brand New January

Out of any other days through out the year.. i choose this last 12 days of 2013 to count the blessings. One day to represent one month in a year. I have to think and count all of my blessings from January to December.

So .. today is the kick off.. Hahaha let's count !!

January 2013 is the month of the new beginning.. I start a whole new life this year. January is my first step to start the Journey. Thank God .. few opportunity arise this year. I remember i moved in to a new house around this month. Hectic .. sad.. yet.. i thank God that somebody would kindly lent us a house.

For real.. at the end of 2012 .. Me and my dad was very confused about where to go after the house contract ended by January 2013...yet God almighty shown us His miracle once more. Somebody that has been helping our neighbour also willing to help us. She rent one of her house to us for free. YES i said it one more time FREE for two years. Wow... God is really good to us !! He never late .. He always in time to help us. So.. by November and December 2013 we spend some money to decorate the new house...fixing things and repainting it.

January 2013.. the house looks amazing .. and everything we need already in place. We officially moved in to a new house for FREE. We did spend some money but it's nothing compare to actually rent a new house.

Thanks God.. His miracle still and always available for those who need and ask to Him.

Jesus is my saviour and i really glad i start this 12 days of thanks God challenge. I don't want to forget moments i've experienced with Him.

Friday, December 13, 2013

Caroling December 2013

Christmas song slightly playing in my room..
Some caroling feeling is filling up my heart..
Heavenly Angels sings thousand melodies..
This are the days my heart feel with rejoice..

The sorrow is dissolved..
The crying heart stay silence..

The fear of loosing turns to joy of giving..
All worries turns to a thankful heart..

December.. December.. December..
Month to reclaim Your love.. abundant love .. to this unworthy soul..
December .. December.. December..
Month to remind me of Your Saint figure..

How i adore Thee
How i adore Thee

Bless thou art who has reborn the soul .. the heart .. the faith..


Saturday, March 30, 2013

Releasing My Heart a Lil' Bit

Today i write again for the first time in 2013. I started to live in a new house this past few months. A tiring months since we have to adjust things and reorganizing old stuff to fit in the new place. But this activity actually brings me back to my good old stuff i used to collect. COMICS !! hahahah The characters in those comis i've read remind me what it feels like to fall in love. Hahaha feels like remembering my teenage days.

I remember my crushes and those teenage love life. Full of thrills and excitement LOL.. That was the days i clearly seems to be clueless that life storm might happen anytime soon. 

Being an adult change everything i was ever dream about. I never stop believing i'm going to something more than just what i have right now, but i gain wisdoms thru' all the sorrow and problem i face lately. I realize what "give in" means.. I thank God for little things in life instead just asking Lord Jesus with egoistic demand.

This will be the week i start to pray to God for contentment in my heart. Not the selfishness to bring me joy.. but to walk in faith when the road seems to be impossible to walk by.

May His Love and Grace is more than sufficient to cover my tormented soul. Amen

Tuesday, January 1, 2013

New Year's Quote

From After Earth movie trailer i found at the end of 2012, i decide to make this Quote stuck in my head:

"You must realize that fear is not real. It is a product of thoughts you create. Now do not misunderstand me, danger is very real. But fear is a choice."

Have a Happy New Year 2013.. don't let your fear take you down.